Monday 30 December 2013

FF#12: knit a scarf

When you were young, what sort of things did 40-year-olds do?

When I was 10, I'm sure my mum knitted.

(I mainly remember her knitting tank tops, to be worn over blouses. She also got perms and wore crazy patterned tights, but no, I'm not planning to try out those this year.)

I did learn to knit a bit when I was wee, but just for the Brownie badge - embroidery was more my thing.

For Christmas this year my Mum - who I'd already enlisted to help with FF#12 - gave me knitting needles with about 40 stitches cast on, and a ball of yarn.

As soon as I unwrapped them I tried to knit. Amazingly, garter stitch came straight back to me like riding a bike! By the time the family settled down to watch Doctor Who I'd knitted about 6 inches and could almost take my eyes off the needles while I was knitting.

And today, five days later, I finished my first scarf!!

proudly wearing my work!

I have loved loved loved knitting. It's been a real surprise. It's all garter stitch, but today I learned how to purl so there should be no stopping me now.

I've always thought that I could never sit still long enough to knit. Maybe it's because it's the holidays and there's a lot of down time, but staying still hasn't been a problem (although I confess to knitting standing up!) - I got a load done at my in-laws house at our annual Boxing Day family gathering. Most of the scarf I knitted while listening to BBC Radio 4's adaptation of Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere in iPlayer, so staying still hasn't been a chore.

Okay, don't look to closely at the scarf.

Um... yes. Character. A scarf full of character.
It's got quite a lot of holes in it and it's a bit of a funny shape. I honestly have no idea how it ended up that shape. At the widest point I had 60 stitches and at the end I had 38. I couldn't have done it if I'd tried. My mum said "it's got character." My sister-in-law said "well, the weans keep interrupting you, that's why." They are both being very generous.


Today when Mum taught my to cast off I felt so bereft that on the way home I bought some more wool. I've already cast on and I'll be knitting as soon as I've finished blogging!

I want to keep practicing so it's probably another scarf on the way - it's easier now because I have no work and no college! But if I ever get to the stage where I can actually (gasp) follow a pattern, I'll feel I've really arrived.

Thanks to my brilliant Mum for helping me fulfill FF#12!

(My mum is on the left in this picture.)

Saturday 21 December 2013

FF #8: My engagement ring



FF #8: get my engagement ring re-made

I got engaged on 14 December 1997. DH (darling husband, but that also happens to be his initials) wanted to ask my mum first (quaint - although I think I made him do it). We went out for a birthday meal with my mum and his parents. I'd already chosen a diamond solitaire and he had it in his pocket. As the evening went on I resorted to gentle kicks under the table, and those facial expressions with judicious use of eyebrows that say "go ON! Ask her! Get on with it!". After dinner he suggested a wee walk up Calton Hill.

You can imagine that in mid-December it was a bit nippy out, and the parents were keen to make the return journey to their homes in Glasgow. About one-third of the way up, they called time on the adventure and said they were off. Dave was forced to ask my mum for my hand in marraige there and then (her answer as I remember it was "oh! well you'll have to ask Elspeth!"), and there was much back-slapping and sniffling. We got married in October 1998.
DH and I when we got engaged in 1997
and when we got married in 1998.

Some time round about 2008, the diamond and it's setting came off the band of my ring. I was lucky to find them in my jeans pocket, but having small children and a wedding ring on the same finger meant that the repair wasn't a priority. I always meant to get it mended but never found the time.

But today I got my special birthday present from DH: my beautiful engagement diamond re-set into a new ring. The setting includes gold from the original band. It's a totally different setting, so it won't catch on my clothes the way the old one did. It is utterly beautiful and I love it. I've been grinning all afternoon since I got it and I can't stop looking at it!

new ring, old diamond.
More than just a piece of jewellery, this diamond means so much to me and I'm so lucky to be able to wear in 24/7 again. Given the chance, I would marry DH all over again and I wouldn't change a thing. Life has happened to us over the last 16 years with good times and challenges, but Love Never Fails. I love DH and I love what we have together. If he asked me to do it all again, I would say yes, yes, yes, without any hesitation.  

(We got my ring re-made by Ariel at Annie Smith in Stockbridge. He was very patient and attentive and he's done a marvellous job!)

Tuesday 17 December 2013

FF#11

#11: Learn to play chess with Scott

Scott is my son and he's 9 years old. I'm not sure how he learned to play chess, but his birthday present to me is to teach me, after giving me a chess set. I hope his understanding of the rules is in fact the same as that of the rest of the chess-playing world.

Chess is one of those things I thought I'd be able to do by the time I was forty - one of those things that 'proper grown-ups' can do.

Tonight, after four days of him eagerly asking me if I'll play chess with him (since he gave me the set), I sat down to have the rules explained to me. We played a game, with me asking lots of questions. For a moment I thought, wouldn't it be terrible if I beat him in my first game?  However I really needn't have worried. He beat me easily.

Me getting beaten by a boy in gorilla onesie.
Chess feels like it works a part of my brain that I usually try to avoid working. I expect it would ward off dementia and be a Very Good Thing To Do.

Scott loves chess and was really passionate about explaining it to me. He's enthusiastic about thinking through his moves. Wow - is this really my son? Off learning things I don't understand, and having the patience and maturity to explain them to me? 

I frequently worry about finding ways to connect with my son while I still have the chance, while he still cares (at least a bit) about what I think and wants to share his passions with me. I've watched him grow from a toddler who want to show me everything into an independent boy with a growing desire for autonomy and privacy. He's not going to want bedtime stories for ever (although we're currently sharing The Hunger Games and he's always begging me to read more, hurray) and then, what will we share? Learning chess from him and playing chess with him, for me it's a way of finding a connection.

So I won't say that I've ticked this one off the list - one game doesn't mean I've learned to play chess - but it's a good start. I'll let you know when I manage to beat him!

Sunday 15 December 2013

The first two done! FF#32 and FF#33

FF 32: To run 40 miles in my birthday week

Days which begin with a good run seldom go wrong and I hope the same is true of years which start with a good run.

My running coach, Angie Spencer, set me the challenge of running 40 miles in my birthday week and running 20 miles on my birthday. Over the course of the week I ran 20 miles - 8 on Monday, 8 on Wednesday (including 4 miles of hill repeats!) and 4 on Thursday, leaving another 20 to run on my birthday.

Saturday mornings are my 'long run' slot, but rarely do I run 20 miles - I've run three marathons and in total I've run 20 miles in training five times. I got up at 5am and after a glass of milk and a spoonful of peanut butter I was on the way by 0530, with my iPod (Wittertainment, Marathon Training Academy and assorted pop tunes), a cheese stick, water bottle and a small packet of pine nuts. 

It was an excellent run, although lack of oxygen in my brain must have been to blame for my lack of distance awareness and I ended up running 22 miles!


FF 33: duet at karaoke with my lovely husband

My lovely husband is a karaoke regular but we've only been to karaoke together a handful of times, and I can't remember that we've ever done a duet (that's not to say we haven't - we don't get out much together so sometimes I get a bit drunk when we go out...). He's always so enthusiastic when he talks about karaoke that I feel left out, and I've never been to either of Edinburgh's karaoke venues with private rooms. So for my birthday he booked a room at Supercube and we had two fantastic hours there with the kids, my mum and her partner. We had a great time - the kids adored it and sang their hearts out!

And here's the evidence for FF33 - it's better from about 1:28. The singing never actually gets any better, only the lighting.


The Big Day - brilliant and not at all painful

This list aimed to ease the pressure on 'having a great birthday' but I still managed to have 'a great birthday'! Here are my forty favourite memories of December 14, 2013.
  1. When the alarm went off (5am) I was dreaming about running a half marathon. I was at 6 miles and it had only taken 32 minutes. My friend Monica appeared and reminded me that time slows down when you're hungry and I should probably eat something. (6 miles takes me about an hour in real life!)
  2. Heading out for my run in my newly unwrapped running gloves from my mum and having cosy, even sweaty, hands for the next three hours
  3. Spotting a car crash being retrieved on Seafield Road and realising that that last time I headed out for a 20 miler, I ran past a car crash being retrieved on Seafield Road. How weird is that? Should I alert the police next time I plan a 20 miler?
  4. Running along Portobello prom enjoying catching some seaside ions at the start of my run, deserted and pitch dark, of course
  5. Realising the hill between London Road and Picardy Place is the worst hill I run. Worse than Arthur's Seat, I'm sure.
  6. Running past the zoo. It's only 7 miles from my house but it always feels like I must have come really far to get there.
  7. Fuelling my run with a cheese string (it has Lisa Simpson on it) and a handful of pine nuts. The pine nuts were really hard to open and I expect a few rodents would have thanked me for all the ones I dropped
  8. Listening to my running coach Angie on her podcast, as I ran down Maybury Road, talking about fuelling, hitting the wall and lactate threshold and realising it wasn't doing my performance any good at all at that particular moment
  9. Running down the hill towards Silverknowes Prom to Thunder In My Heart by Leo Sayer and really feeling the endorphins kick in (mile 16!) and knowing the wind would be at my back till I got home
  10. Realising at Silverknowes Prom that I'd miscalculated and my 20 miler was going to be a 22 miler. Darn.
  11. Mile 20! Hurray! At Granton! And the first thing to be ticked off my magic list!! Still 2 miles from home! Bah! (it felt much harder from here on in)
  12. Finally stopping running on Leith Links and my knees aching instantly
  13. Being bombarded with presents and cards by excited children as soon as I got in the door
  14. Enjoying the feeling of icy water on my aching legs
  15. Watching icy bubbles slowly escaping from my legwarmers (over my knees) for the duration of my bath (10 minutes)
  16. Hopping out the bath when I realised I'd got in without taking my iPod off first (amazingly it's still working!)
  17. Scoffing eggs, bacon and spinach as I dried my hair, and the way food tastes after 22 miles (just awesome!!)
  18. Sitting beside other mums at Helen's open ballet class and being able to casually and comfortably chat to people I don't really know very well. I couldn't do THAT in my twenties. 
  19. Feeling so proud of my little dancing girl, and realising that even though she loves ballet, she isn't enjoying tap & jazz - I could see that *because I'm her mum*.
  20. Distracting children with the iPod/iPad and being allowed to open my presents at my own pace instead of having them thrown at me by over-excited children 
  21. Arriving at The Vintage and Katie the server saying "Hello. it is your birthday? Happy Birthday!" and giving me a massive hug!
  22. Katie asking Helen to wear her earrings while she listened to Helen's iPod - Helen was delighted and Katie got a wee blast of Kelly Clarkson.
  23. Scott's delighted face when he got a shandy. And asking his dad to put it out of reach for a while so he didn't down it in one
  24. Dave toasting me for my birthday before we started dinner. He looked so sincere and full of love and made me excited to be his wife
  25. Having my very favouritest food, goat's cheese brullee, brought to me in a massive dish with four candles and everyone singing happy birthday - I felt so happy and delighted to be the centre of attention
  26. Singing "Jackson" with my lovely husband at Sugarcube, and ticking of the second thing on my list!!
  27. Hearing Helen hit perfect notes when she sang "Same Jeans" in karaoke - better than the rest of us, she must have the singing gene!
  28. Scott performing Baseline Junkie, Radio Edit perfectly - despite the 'real' words appearing on screen
  29. Sugarcube was great, clean, loud, attractive, and the staff were really friendly and one of them had pink hair (he was a boy)
  30. It was windy and cold and wet outside and I raged against my December birthday which has always made it so hard to do the things I want to do! Nobody wants to go out and do stuff in rotten weather and your hair gets *ruined*!
  31. Robert singing at karaoke. He was brilliant with a slighty Vic Reeves Pub Singer edge and I thought of Billy Connolly's line about trying to find a party, walking around with a carry-oot listening for singing - well THIS would be the singing!
  32. Iced cappucino despite wet, cold, windy weather
  33. Trying to take 40 photos to represent my day (only managed 27)
  34. I got nothing but brilliant presents. 
  35. Scott giving me a chess set (one of my forty things is to learn to play chess) and instantly starting to ask me if he can please teach me to play chess now
  36. Helen giving me a little jar with a chalkboard section on the front so you can label the jar. I wrote 'farts' on it in chalk and started the family euphamism "quick! go and get the jar!"
  37. Forty presents from my mum, all of them spot on! From lip balm and emery boards to  almond butter and notebooks, to a 'Marathon Package' of my choice, including entry fee, travel, meals and childcare - every single thing was something I would have chosen myself
  38. Leaving Dave at the Vintage (he didn't mind to much) so we could all fit in the taxi, which turned out to be big enough for us all anyway
  39. Helen fell asleep on the settee when we got home and woke up when I carried her to bed (she is much heavier than the last time I carried her to bed). She grinned and said "jerky plomp! you woke me up!" and giggled before falling asleep again
  40. In bed at 2238, shattered but my heart was racing from having eaten too much!

Friday 13 December 2013

The Forty Fest: The List

Tomorrow will be my fortieth birthday.

I've learned from the last 39 years (or at least the ones I can remember) that December birthdays are difficult to celebrate. Too close to Christmas, the celebrant and their friends tend to be tired, busy, skint, preoccupied with shopping, family, exams and staying warm to really want to celebrate.

(It occurs to me right now that perhaps all my friends for the last 39 years just haven't wanted to celebrate with me... I hope that's just pre-fortieth insecurity. Not that my birthdays haven't been great, but they've taken a fair bit of work and organising.)

So, for my fortieth birthday, I decided to stretch out the celebrations with a mini-birthday every month, seeing a different friend or group of friends and having a celebration on the 14th of each month.

But 40 is a more fitting number than 12, and so my list of forty things was born. I've spent a few months thinking about what I'd like to do for my birthday, and who I'd like to celebrate with. My list is as follows, in no particular order.
  1. spend a day smiling at everyone I see
  2. learn to meditate
  3. run a spring marathon
  4. go dancing in a nightclub
  5. spend a night under canvas
  6. join the marathon maniac club
  7. skinny dip with friends
  8. get my engagement ring re-made
  9. try a burlesque workshop
  10. have a McGonnagal Supper
  11. Learn to play chess with Scott (my son)
  12. Knit a scarf
  13. Run a sub-4-hour marathon
  14. raise £4000 for Parkinsons UK
  15. have a full medical
  16. become a mistress of the chin-up
  17. get my teeth whitened
  18. go on a bus tour with my Mum
  19. dance a duet with my best friend Hannah
  20. go to a fitness professionals convention
  21. try poledance
  22. hoop a 5K
  23. paint a fairy door
  24. host a fundraising hafla (or three)
  25. finally visit the Scottish Parliament
  26. one month fitness challenge - get more sleep
  27. write My Running Story
  28. integrate yoga into my life
  29. have a beautiful mirrored studio to work in
  30. be able to do handstands, or walk on my hands
  31. learn 10 things about myself
  32. run 40 miles in my birthday week
  33. duet at karaoke with my lovely husband
  34. have tea in Edinburgh City Chambers
  35. get on All Request Friday on Radio 2
  36. meet 40 new people 
  37. make a difference in Malawi
  38. fitness challenge - 40 full push-ups continuous
  39. not let my roots get out of control 
  40. get a daily make-up regime
Some of these are volunteered by my friends and family, some represent where I thought I'd be when I got to be 40, and some are whimsical and frivolous. Some will be more challenging than others. There's nothing there I really don't want to do, because let's face it, it won't get done.

This blog will be my record of doing these forty things. Thanks for stopping by to hear about my journey - I hope you'll come back and see my progress!